We Were En Fuego

This weekend we:

Were feeling motivated and inspired so we took advantage of the rarity and tackled a few major yard projects.  First, we took down the swing set, much to the kids dismay.  They really loved playing on it, but after nearly five years we felt like it was getting a little old and unstable.  Why did we feel that way?  I think it was the fact that it shook perilously every time one or more children climbed on it…

We let the kids cross the monkey bars one last time before dismantling their beloved swing set.

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After taking don the swing set, we decided that it would be nice to completely open up our backyard.  And in order to do that, the chain link fence would need to go.  So we took it down.  And we are both wickedly sore after doing so.  But the yard?  Looks awesome.

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Notice the dog in the corner who is now leashed to a tree.  She is the only one not impressed with our hard work.

Notice the dog in the corner who is now leashed to a tree. She is the only one not impressed with our hard work.

We also took advantage of the great weather and planted flowers.  Have I mentioned that I love spring?

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A few other weekend activities included:

– Lee and I attending the wedding of a friend.  I was her counselor at a children’s camp when I was in high school.  And she’s married now.  I feel old…

– My sweet friend Lindsey (who is also sister to the above mentioned bride), and I went to visit with the man who forever altered the course of my life when I was fifteen and he took me on my first mission trip to the former Soviet Union.  He is now battling a cancer that is extremely aggressive and is ravaging his body.  For almost three hours we sat and talked with him, laughing, reminiscing and soaking up his wisdom.  I would like to write more about Gary, but I need some time to process all that we discussed yesterday.  But I would like to ask that you join me in praying for him and his family. 

– Tia asked me to braid her hair so that she could look “woody pitty” for daddy.  So I did.  Then I took pictures. 

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– I cleaned the wall after Landon played Picasso. 

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What we did NOT do:

– Go to Sloan’s first baseball game due to muddy fields.

– Go to Tia’s soccer game due to lack of motivation.

What did you do and NOT do this weekend?

We Interrupt This Broadcast

Life is so busy and crazy right now that I seriously feel like I am suffocating.  I can’t breathe.  We only have a few weeks of school left and it can’t come soon enough in my opinion.  I need a break.  I’m sure two weeks into summer I’ll be begging for school to start again…

All that to say – I got nothin’ today.  So I’m sending you over to Becke’s blog where you can read the post I wrote for her yesterday.  It’s a post that I need to read myself today and I hope you will be encouraged by it, as I have been.

Grey’s Anatomy and FRIENDS and Glee, Oh MY!

After talking with several people and thinking through the question I asked yesterday, I thought it would be fun to expand a bit on the topic of protecting our kids from the images thrown at them from popular culture.  (That’s right, I said FUN.)

This train of thought started with Tuesday night’s episode of Glee, which was a little over the top.  It was Madonna night so I should have been prepared, but I was still taken aback as I watched “high schoolers” dance and sing about losing their virginity. 

Now again, I will say that I do appreciate the ultimate message portrayed (even if it was watered down) that girls should take control of their bodies and not succomb to pressure, but the way the message was sent made me terribly uncomfortable and had me questioning whether or not I would want my kids watching such a show were they old enough to do so.

I tend to be a little conservative when it comes to what my kids watch and listen to.  Sloan and I have already had conversations about this as there are several  movies that he wants to watch that I simply won’t let him watch.  The main reason is because I want him to learn what it means to guard his heart and his mind.

Remember the Twister fiasco?  That was one instance in which I let my guard down and for several nights we dealt with the consequences.  So he and I have talked about the fact that God doesn’t want us to be scared or worried or anxious and if we watch movies that make us feel that way, then we are not doing a good job of guarding our minds.

And I plan to continue to vigilantly guard the hearts and minds of my children as they grow older.  Just as my parents did for me.  When everyone I knew was watching Beverly Hills 90210, I was left in the dark.  I didn’t know who the Walsh’s were or why Kelly and Donna were fighting.  Because my parents were protecting my heart and mind from the bombardment of messages that did not line up with the way they were raising me.  And you know what?  I was no worse for the wear for missing that show.

(I did ultimately see many of the re-runs when I was in college and studying in Ukraine.  Everyday when I got home from school, my brain was fried from speaking russian all day, and 90210 came on just as I got home.  The translation was on enough of a delay that I could hear the English and for an hour didn’t have to try and translate in my head.  So I got well acquainted with the show then and truly realized that I hadn’t miss much.)

It is a similar story with the show FRIENDS.  While I don’t ever remember a specific time that my parents told me I could not watch that show (I believe it started airing my junior year of high school), I also don’t remember ever once seeing it until my later college years.  There just wasn’t an emphasis on television in my home and while I watched it a little, there were certain shows that I simply knew they wouldn’t approve of, so I avoided them. 

FRIENDS ultimately became one of my favorite TV shows, but I began watching it when I was older and better able to filter the messages through a more developed worldview and stronger sense of who I was and what I believed.

So, back to Glee.  I don’t know that, after Tuesday’s episode alone, I would forever forbid my kids from watching the show.  For the most part, while the show clearly holds rather loose values, I think it’s a fun, campy hour of television that does not take itself too seriously and, yeah – I think it would open the doors for a lot of conversations.

Now a show like Grey’s Anatomy, on the other hand, is hands down, no way, dont-even-think-about-asking if you can watch this show.  I’ve even forbidden myself from watching that show anymore, it got so ridiculous.  It went from once upon a time being about the characters and witty, quippy dialogue to some kind of political message wrapped up in preachy dialogue and completely inappropriate scenes that do not deserve to be on public television.

I realize that I may be more sensitive to this subject than others are.  While I doubt we will ever swear off TV altogether (although I have no problem with that if the content of shows continue to spiral down the path they’re on now), but I take my job as mom very seriously.  And, in the long run, I don’t think my kids will suffer irreperable damage if they aren’t able to watch the one show that all of their friends are watching.  It won’t send them into counseling.

Oh no…there are plenty of other crazy mom neuroses that I can pull into play to make sure they end up laying on a counselor’s couch someday.  Like, for instance, this insane notion I have that they should play outside instead of watch TV or play computer games all day long.  Sloan literally moments ago stomped out of my room grumbling that I never let him do anything fun. “You always make me play outside and read books and stuff.  That’s boring.”

I’m so mean…

Random bits of information and a question

* Today is the day.  We’ve waited four months for this.  We’ve cried and labored.  We’ve thrown our hands up in frustration and cheered at small victories.  We’ve begged and pleaded and felt utterly desperate.  And today we will see if our hard work and efforts paid off. 

What, pray tell am I talking about?  Why – I am talking about Landon’s weigh-in!  Yes, we are going to see if he’s gained the 3/4 of a pound that the doctor wanted him to gain.  Given that he still eats only a few bites of food per day, I’m a little nervous.  But I think he’s gotten taller so I’m hoping that compensates for everything.

* Speaking of Landon, I love his hair long.  It’s so very cute the way it hangs in his eyes and bounces when he runs.  But the other day, I must admit I started to feel sorry for the him as he had to tip his head back to an uncomfortable angle just to see anything.  So I trimmed the front of his hair just slightly…

Slightly too much.  I’m going to need to take him in because now he looks like he has a mullet.  Remind me to never, ever, ever try and trim my children’s hair.    I really should know better…

* I’m sitting next to my daughter who is wearing the most adorable little bubble dress with her hair up in frilly bows.  I would take a pictures to show you, but I’m lazy and don’t feel like it – you’ll just have to trust me.  She is sugary sweet and looks like a little doll.  It never gets old dressing little girls.

* I’m still upset about the russian adoption situation and frustrated that no charges have been brought agains the woman who sent her adopted son back to Russian with a note pinned to his chest.  Why on Earth hasn’t she been charged?!  I don’t get it.  The child was legally hers, he was officially an American citizen and by the letter of the law, he was her son.  Does this mean when I’m having a particularly difficult day with my son, I can ship him to Russia without fear of repercussion?  Because, trust me, there are times when that sounds appealing…

The whole situation makes me angry.
* Lee and I took the kids to the local high school last night and ran the track with them.  It was really fun.  We sprinted, raced, jumped and laughed.  Lee strapped a parachute to his back for wind resistance.  He looks ridiculous while running with that thing, but it’s a great workout so he does it anyway. It was fun to watch to watch him use it until he ran past Sloan and the parachute caught the back of his head, yanking his feet out from under him and resulting in a fat lip.  Good times…

* We watched our two favorite shoes last night: Glee and LOST.  LOST did not disappoint.  Seriously, I think I’m going to go through withdrawls when that show ends this year.

Glee, however, was a little disappointing.  It was Madonna night so I expected big things.  It did make me laugh out loud several times (I love Sue Sylvester), but it also made me uncomfortable.  The whole high schooler’s dealing with sex thing makes me squirm.  Remember how I felt after seeing the movie Valentine’s Day? 

To Glee’s credit, they did handle it as well as I would expect a Hollywood produced show to handle it.  It was all about female empowerment and girls taking control of their bodies and not succombing to pressure.  So, you know, that’s good.

But as I watched all I could think was how in the world do parents with teenagers deal with shows like this?  Because I don’t know that I would want my kids watching that show if they were older.  And yet it’s such a piece of popular culture, I wouldn’t doubt that they would want to watch it.  So what would I do?  Would I let them watch it and then dialogue with them afterwards about what a healthy, godly view of sex is?  Or would I simply not let them watch it?  Parents with older children, give me your thoughts.  I really want to know.

Do shows like Glee that are light hearted and fun and uber-popular make parenting a headache?  Do you let your children watch them?  How do you handle these pieces of culture that bombard our kids with messages that aren’t enitrely healthy?

Do share!

Tia Tales: The Four Year Old Edition

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She is part girl, part Tazmanian Devil.  She is gregarious and passionate.  Equal parts sugar and spice, she really is everything nice.  And she is 100% a four year old, which means she lets loose with a few gems now and again.

Take, for instance, our trip to Target last week.  As we run into the store (and when I say run, I mean run.  This child rarely walks), she smacks right into one of those big, red, cement balls out front.  And at a decible only a preschooler can create exclaims, “Ow!  My penis!”

And the older couple in front of us turn in surprise then melt into laughter.  And I wonder if I could possibly dig a hole in the ground and bury myself there…

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She’s a happy girl who loves to dress up, but won’t let a dress stop her from having fun.  In fact, I’m pretty certain you won’t find a messier child on planet earth.  It’s probably a good thing we don’t have a little girl behind her, because I don’t know that I have a single outfit without a stain on it.

She’s also fearless.  She will climb up and jump off of anything.  Case in point, we were at a friends country home this weekend.  They have a swing chained to a tree branch and it swings out over a hill so when you’re swinging forward, you’re much higher in the air than you expect to be.

My kids love to jump off swings.  Sloan went first and in keeping with his thoughtful approach to life, he waited until he had slowed down a bit before jumping and rolling down the hill.  Tia went next.  In keeping with her fly by the seat approach to life, she jumped at the peak of her swing, which means that she was easily 6 feet in the air when she launched.  Maybe more.

Lee and I had heart attacks and both yelped.  She arced through the air as confident as could be and slammed to the ground.  I was certain she broke both ankles, but she hopped up, turned around and gave us a look like Dude!  I totally had that.

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She takes delight in tormenting her brothers.  De-light.  Here she is spraying them with the hose.  Despite the fact that Landon was screaming his head off, she chased him across the yard, spraying and grinning like the Cheshere Cat.

Then she tried to spray me.

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I caught her putting on my make-up last night.  She had on blue eye shadow, a LOT of blush and red lipstick.  She looked like a little Vegas Showgirl.  When I asked her what she was doing she gave me “the look” (the one that clearly says, Duh Mom…) and said, “I jus want to be woody (really) pitty for Daddy.”

I caught her taking a swig out of the Infant Tylenol bottle yesterday.  Fun times.  She didn’t get but a sip, but I made sure she understood how dangerous it was to drink medicine.  She shrugged her shoulders and said, “Yes Ma’am, I undewstand…but I still woody, woody fink I need medicine.”

“Why do you need medicine?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” she said.  “I just fought if I said dat you would give me some.”

She is my girl and, my goodness, I am madly in love with her.  Even if I am fairly certain she is conspiring to make sure I age at hyperspeed.

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The Tea Party

I have never been much of a girly girl. I enjoy nice clothes and make up, but I’m not primpy or frilly, I don’t know how to sew and none of these things have ever bothered me.  And I can proudly say that I have never once in all my life jumped up and down squealing and crying over a celebrity (although had I had a personal encounter with John Travolta in high school I might have swooned a little…and fainted…).

But there is one thing that brings out the frill that lays buried deep inside.  It is the one thing that makes me happy to pull out an apron and want to sip Shirley Temple’s while skipping about my kitchen.

A tea party.  Commence to girl squealing now!

I threw a tea party over the weekend and it was all sorts of frilly.  There were flowers and lace.  We noshed on such dishes as Caramalized Pear, Roasted Walnut and Bleu Cheese Quiche and Lavendar Tea Cakes.  There were Spinach-Basil Scones and Martha Washington Petite Cakes, Roasted Turkey and Avacado finger sandwiches and Cinnamon Plum Tea.  Oh it was yummy and girly and fun, fun, fun.

I’m giggling.  Right now.  Giggling like a little girl.

The pictures to follow will show you why.  If you’re a girl, you will likely breathe a small sigh and smile.  If you’re a dude, you’ll probably feel sorry for Lee as you imagine him being forced to sample all the lovely cuisine.  (He does have to sample it all.  And he doesn’t like it.  Hmph…)

Enjoy.  You may want to grab a napkin as drooling is quite the possibility.

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The Centerpiece

The Centerpiece

I know.  Makes you want to weep...

I know. Makes you want to weep...

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See how happy they are?

See how happy they are?

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Even my own little tomboy got to come along. I'm raising a second generation tea party addict.  No politics allowed!

Even my own little tomboy got to come along. I'm raising a second generation tea party addict. No politics allowed!

How was your weekend?

The confidence to walk away

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Yesterday we had the first of what I trust will be many incidences where a crushed and devastated child came home after experiencing the hurtful behavior of a so called friend.

I will not go into the details of the incident here, except to say that it bordered on bullying and it broke Sloan’s heart.  It wasn’t physical, but he was emotionally crushed and, as his mom, I hurt for him in a way I’ve not yet experienced.  I get teary just thinking about it.

My sweet Sloan.  I’ve chronicled some of the wonderful, funny, immensely blessed characteristics that make up this remarkable boy.  He is kind and tender hearted.  Remember his love for our older mailman, Mr. Herman?  A couple of weeks ago he came in after retrieving the mail and told us that Mr. Herman’s wife was sick.  “We should pray for her,” he said.  And so we did.  And the next day Sloan made sure to tell Herman we prayed for his wife.  That’s the kind of boy he is.

Sloan is precocious, to be sure.  He’s very confident in a lot of ways, but also becoming more aware of what others think and some of his innocence is slipping away.  He’s becoming a little more self-concious, which makes me a little sad. 

One of Sloan’s best qualities, however, is his loyalty and his ability to make and love on friends.  This is a quality that cannot be taught.  It is inborn and innate to who he is and I love that about him.  He loves his friends with every fiber of his being.  Even if they hurt him.

That’s not to say he isn’t willing to fight back.  Sloan’s mouth can be his downfall at times.  We’re working on helping him learn to control his words because that’s how he fights.  It’s not constructive and it gets him in trouble.  But at least he’s not hitting anyone, right?

As we walked home from his friend’s house yesterday after “the incident,” I talked to Sloan about how important it is to choose friends who build you up; friends who make you feel good about yourself; friends that make you smile, not cry.  And even though he had just been ganged up on, his immediate respone was to look me straight in the eye and say, “But mom, I love them.  They’re my best friends.”

Sweet, sweet boy.

There were no tears, but I could tell his spirit was crushed.  We returned home and I began dinner and then I heard a few sniffles.  I looked over and he had his head buried in his arms.  I scooped him up and the dam broke.

“Why did they do that to me?” he sobbed.

Oh, it broke my heart.  I let him cry for a few minutes then set him down and reminded him that he was a child of God and he was incredibly special, kind and good.  I then thanked him for being such a good friend, even when he was hurting.  I refrained from saying anything nasty about the kids who hurt him, but I will confess that some very un-Christian monikers crossed my mind.

Points to me for holding back…

And after dinner we walked to a local ice cream place and got ice cream cones.  It did his heart good to get out and run off some steam.  And ice cream does wonders for healing the soul, does it not?

I remember how I felt as a kid when a friend hurt me.  I remember the devastation I felt and the confusion.  But I must say, the devastation I felt as a kid doesn’t even compare to the hurt I felt for my own child yesterday.  It cut to my core and it still aches.  I know this is only the beginning as I’ve got a little girl coming up behind him and if you think boys can be cruel – oh my!

Lee and I work hard to instill in our children the confidence that they will always be loved and accepted in our home.  And when the days of disappointment come, I want them to know that they can run home and cry and find comfort and healing.

I also want to teach Sloan that it’s okay to just walk away.  That’s hard for him.  He depends on friendships, thrives on them.  So teaching him to protect his heart without crushing that natural and precious loyal spirit will be our challenge.

And now I’m going to go wipe my eyes and blow my nose.  If only I had some ice cream to calm my nerves!

Wordless Wednesday: The Time Out

The two year old has morphed into a two year old seemingly overnight.  Where he once was compliant and sweet natured, he is now often beligerant and feisty.  He is experiencing discipline to its fullness here lately, including his first ever time out. 

Stubborn Resignation

Stubborn Resignation

Shame

Shame

Guilt

Guilt

Deep Thought

Deep Thought

Is that remorse? Uh...I'm not sure that it is.

Is that remorse? Uh...I'm not sure that it is.

It's a good thing he's so cute.

It's a good thing he's so cute.

Happy Wednesday!

Happy Wednesday!

The Zoo

Tia had school yesterday – Sloan did not.  So I went back and forth about whether or not we should go to the Zoo after Tia went to school or whether she should just skip school and we could go in the morning.

I decided that it wouldn’t kill her to miss a day of preschool, so we headed out to the Zoo around 8:30 yesterday morning.  Best. decision. ever.  The Zoo was virtually empty when we arrived, which is a good thing when you have three kids who all like to run in different directions. 

By 12:15 when we left, however, the Zoo was…well – a zoo!  I knew it was time to leave when every time I turned around to check on Landon (who insists on walking about 15 paces behind us at all freaking times) he was out of my line of sight due to being swept up in large groups of people.  After my third heart attack, I decided to call it a day.

So we bopped out of the park and jumped in our car, which was parked right up front and headed out past the endless line of cars waiting to park. 

New camera pics

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There's nothing like pickingyour nose oon a train ride.  You should try it sometime...

There's nothing like picking your nose on a train ride. You should try it sometime...

Recently Updated

Becke', I tried to get a picture of his bootie for you but he wouldn't turn. :)

Becke', I tried to get a picture of his bootie for you but he wouldn't turn. 🙂

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My New Toy

After selling much of my childhood and pieces of my parents souls on Craig’s List, I finally made enough money to purchse the one thing I’ve desired for awhile now.  A good camera.

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My parents are moving from their home of 13 years into a small condo.  It’s a good thing.  It’s the right decision.  But it means getting rid of many of the items that I grew up with. Furniture and decorations that have graced the houses of my parents different homes for most of my life.  It’s hard – not as hard for me since I have been living on my own for a long time – but definately hard for them.

My mom was sweet enough to let me post and sell her stuff and, as a reward, split the money she made fifty-fifty.  And thus my brand, spanking new camera.  My magic camera that actually takes the pictures I want it to take.  And I’ve had a good time taking said pictures this weekend.

Yesterday we went to my parents house for one last holiday meal.  And we all tried to keep it light when discussing their move, because if we started talking too seriously, the tears would begin to flow.  So we laughed and joked, but inside we were all feeling a bit sentimental.  Change is never easy, even if it’s necessary.

Despite the emotions, however, we had a wonderful day.  The weather was perfect, the kids were well behaved and I was able to document it all just the way I wanted to…

Here is a little collage of our Easter Sunday:

Easter

Click on the image to see a larger view.

And, of course, here are a few more pictures from the weekend.  The camera has been practically attached to my hand…

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Blurred background! That was the one thing I wanted in a camera - the ability to actually focus on what I wanted to focus on.

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We had a crazy week with several nights of late bedtimes.  Which means Landon did a lot of this Saturday morning when we went to Forest Park.

We had a crazy week with several nights of late bedtimes. Which means Landon did a lot of this Saturday morning when we went to Forest Park.

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Poor boy. His parents need to get him a haircut. He's looking like a mushroom head...

Poor boy. His parents need to get him a haircut. He's looking like a mushroom head...

We’re going to the Zoo today so look forward to more pictures tomorrow!

Today’s post for STL Family Life is up.  Go check it out and let me know what you think!