Archives for 2009

We made it!

October 22, 2009 by Kelli

Wednesday nights are busy for us. The kids have Awana’s at church and Lee and I serve in the music ministry. So it’s always late when we get home on Wednesday and roll our sleepy babes into their beds.

And this morning was the first time we’ve ever overslept. I rolled over at 7:15 this morning and for a brief moment thought about just going back to sleep and letting Sloan play hooky today.

But reason got the best of me and I dragged him out of bed around 7:30, clapped my hands several times, and managed to get him on the bus at 7:57 with hair and teeth brushed, and a tummy full of Cheerios.

Because I rock.

Of course, Landon is still in his soggy diaper and jammies, but one out of three ready to go isn’t bad, eh?

The thing is, it’s so hard to wake them up when they look like this:

I couldn’t even get a picture of Sloan because he was snuggled so deep into his covers that all I could see was a smattering if blonde hair splayed across his pillow.

So the day started a little hectic but the good news is, we’re all well rested! How was your morning?

A post I wrote about my family heritage went up on 5 Minutes for Mom yesterday. Go check it out when you get the chance!

Filed Under: Kids, Life, Motherhood, Random, School Tagged With: waking sleepy kids

My Minivan is cooler than your Lexus!

October 20, 2009 by Kelli

Due to several car trips in the last few months, our minivan has taken a bit of a beating. Covered in dead bugs, splattered with mud and sporting the drop marks accrued during our deluge of rain last week, her sleek black exterior has lost a little bit of it’s luster.

It’s not often that one reads the words “sleek” and “luster” in the context of a minivan, I know.

So yesterday afternoon, I took my rockin’ hot minivan through a specialty car wash. You know, one of those car washes where actual humans scrub your car?

After pulling her loveliness into line, I got out and shopped around the convenience store for a few minutes before heading out to watch them remove the layers of dirt that had been holding her back all these weeks. And what did I find when I came out?

I found my minivan sandwiched between two Lexus’s (is the plural Lexi?) who were also being scrubbed to shiney perfection. Then a third Lexus pulled up, followed by a BMW and a fourth Lexus.

And finally, the Créme de la Créme – a gorgeous (and I’m not a car person) sports car pulled up and parked nose to nose with my van. I have no idea what brand it was, but it was somthin’ fancy, let me tell ya!

And guys, I kid you not, my van blushed and giggled when that thing parked in front of her.

And so, there I stood, the girl who brought her hoopty van to a class act party. I was the like the stray dog at a country club. The sore thumb. The minivan surrounded by Lexi!

I tried to play it all cool like this was only my day car, but you should see what I drive at night. But my mom garb didn’t help the situation – that being my unwashed hair, jeans, tennis shoes and puffer vest.

Oh, then there was the fact that I forgot to bring cash to tip the boys washing my car and had to scrounge for enough change to make it worth their while. I, my friends, am nothing if not classy.

The best part of the whole process, though, was watching the boys attempt to work my tricked out van. What she lacks in style she makes up in sheer awesomeness! I mean, hello! She has an automatic back hatch and one automatic side door, which I have child proofed, so the poor guys kept getting stuck inside the car when vacuuming because they couldn’t figure out how to open the door and got confused as to which was automatic and which was manual.

Good times.

And then, of course, there are the multiple – and I mean mul.ti.ple – scratches on the car from the kids running their bikes down the sides. Yep – that’s how I roll.

So when the guys finally finished her up and handed me the keys, I climbed inside my now sleek and lusterous minivan and started her up. Next to the purring sports car, she sounded like some sort mammoth as she roared to life.

And with that I held my head high, looked down upon the lowly sports car and I pulled out of Lexusland, driving her hotness off into the horizen. I hope everyone watching wasn’t too jealous…

Filed Under: funny stuff that happens, Life, Minivans Tagged With: car wash, Minivans

Weekend Update

October 19, 2009 by Kelli

This weekend’s Interactive Festival went off smashingly. We had a great turnout (I believe there were just under 100 people there) and had relatively no major glitches.

We got a ton of positive feedback and people seemed to really enjoy themselves and learn a lot.

As for my panel – it went great! I didn’t stumble or stutter over my words, I kept the conversation flowing (thanks to a fabulous panel of speakers and a very participatory audience) and I didn’t once have to imagine someone in their underwear. Whew. I had a blast doing it and can’t wait for next year’s event!

As for the rest of the weekend – honestly, Interactive took up most of my weekend. The kids had a great time playing with their grandparents, since Lee was out of town visiting friends. On Sunday afternoon, I decided to take the kids to Twin Oaks Park for our annual picture taking session. I sat in on a photography panel on Saturday and was excited to try out the new tricks I learned.

I think out of 82 pictures I managed to come out with about 9 really good shots. Sooooo…I clearly need a little more practice. It didn’t help that Landon was 100% not into having his picture made, and Tia wasn’t overly thrilled either.

Here are a few that I got:

I don't think I got a single good shot of the three of them *sigh*

I asked Tia to give me her best pose and this is what she came up with.

I’ll be back tomorrow with actual content for you to read. In the meantime, have a blessed Monday!

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Landon, Random, Sloan, Tia Tagged With: St. Louis Interactive Festival, Twin Oaks Park

A few deep breaths…and maybe a stiff drink

October 15, 2009 by Kelli

On Saturday morning I will be moderating a panel at the St. Louis Interactive Festival. I’m so excited about this event. After last year’s Festival, I made it my goal to be considered knowledgable to be asked to speak and lookie here!

Except…

Oh dear God I’m so nervous I feel like I’m going to be sick. And I’m only a moderator. I’m just asking the questions. I’m not even speaking as a definate authority. But I’m still nervous as all get out and here’s why:

(Don’t you love how naturally I segued into this next paragraph thereby sucking you all in to read about my neurotic little mental breakdown? You didn’t even know it happened did you? You had no idea you were being manipulated. Muahahaha!!!)

Okay – so I’ve never really “officially” been in the workforce. The few years I had between marriage, college graduation and children were spent developing a career of sorts in writing and editing while also coaching gymnastics and working as a personal trainer. In short, I’ve never had a “real” job. I’ve never had a steady paycheck or limited vacation time (a huge perk to working for yourself, by the way). I’ve never been to an office party or had to wear a suit to work.

In short – my life has been awesome! Ahem.

So I get around all these uber successful people and I’m all, “OMG (I actually think omg ) why would they want to listen to me? So I’ve written a couple of books – who cares? I did all of that in my pajamas! I’ve never been in the rat race. What do I know?”

And on and on it goes until I’ve got myself all in a tizzy thinking about standing in front of a group of people who are all really career focused, employed, making the big bucks, doing cool things like hosting radio shows, producing movies, running major publications…

And then, of course, there is the importance of figuring out what to wear! Oy!

So I’m taking deep breaths tonight. And I thought about having a stiff drink but I feel like I’m getting sick so I settled for NyQuil instead.

It’s going to be fine. I’ll picture them all in their underwear and all will be good.

Plus, I need to remember that I haven’t exactly had my head in the mud these last few years. I mean, I have produced three pretty spectacular human beings and I do maintain a blog that’s all the awesome.

…

Okay, I was hoping that if I patted myself on the back a little, I’d feel better, but I’m still nervous and now I feel like a dork for tooting my own horn. I think it’s time for me to go to bed and wake up tomorrow with a new sense of empowerment.

Yeah – that’s what I’m gonna do…

Filed Under: Blogging, Life, Random Tagged With: St. Louis Bloggers Guild, St. Louis Interactive Festival

A fun little conversation

October 14, 2009 by Kelli

I don’t have much for you today. I’m so busy working on this Saturday’s St. Louis Interactive Festival that I haven’t had much time for anything else. Oh, and my internet was down all morning.

I KNOW, RIGHT?!

Please, if you are interested in attending the Interactive Festival, I encourage you to do so. We have some A-HA-MAZING speakers lined up. Seriously – top notch folks. Don’t believe me? Check out the St. Louis Bloggers Guild site and read for yourself. Every day this week, I have been writing out descriptions of each panel and giving you the bios of all our speakers.

It’s FREE to attend AND your registration includes breakfast, lunch and beverages! What a deal! You should come!!!

M’kay – moving on…

I had an interesting little conversation with Tia this morning as I got dressed. It went something like this.

Tia: “Mommy, I wike your undawear.”

Me: “Thanks, Tia.”

“Tia: “Who buyed dat for you?”

Me: “Nobody – I bought it for myself.”

Tia: “You buyed your own undawear?”

Me: “Yep.”

Tia: “Well, who buyed you your pants?”

Me: “Nobody. I bought these pants for myself.”

Tia: “Why you buyin’ you own cwothes?”

Me: “Well, when you get to be a grown-up, you just usually buy your own clothes.”

Tia: “Dat woody thtinkths, Mommy.” (That really, stinks) I fink dat sounds bowing (boring).”

Me: *pause* “Well, it does kind of stink doesn’t it?”

Being a grown up is so boring…

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Random, Tia Tagged With: St. Louis Interactive Festival

Pop-a Pocka Posies

October 13, 2009 by Kelli

There are days when they fight,

When they kick, scream and bite

Fall '09 004

There are days when I feel

Like I’m losing my mind.

Those are the days I don’t really like.

But then there are days – snapshots frozen in time,

When they laugh, sing and play,

These days I like.

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Motherhood, School Tagged With: Ring Around the Rosies

We came face to face with Big Foot

October 12, 2009 by Kelli

My kids love a good story. And as story tellers go, I have to say, my husband and I are pretty good.

Remember this story that Sloan and I concocted with his Star Wars figurines and a dollhouse?

While my stories tend to be rather fantastic and, erm, out there (think unicorns and flying mommy’s) Lee are more realistic and he adds a lot of special sound effects. He’s actually freaked Tia out with his stories so much that she immediately burrows under her bed covers before he even begins.

And, well, you know how we get pleasure out of terrifying our poor children…

Last night was a beautiful fall night. A little cold for my liking, but pleasant enough for us to take a long walk as a family, then come home and build a fire in the fire pit and roast hot dogs, then sit in a circle and tell stories.

When Lee began telling his story about two little boys camping in the woods where a Big Foot was known to live, a hush fell over our little group. Tia climbed into my lap and put her hands over her ears as Lee ran around in the shadows of the yard, growling softly, rattling the chain link fence and stomping around.

Midway through the story, Landon climbed into my arms. Because he’s a bit of a mama’s boy and tends to get jealous when others get my time, I assumed he just wanted to let Tia know that he had a solid stake on the territory of my lap.

Lee ended his story by telling us all to close our eyes. When we did, he dashed back into the darkest part of the yard and shook the chain link fence letting out a fierce growl. Sloan and Tia screamed and laughed. I let out a mock scream and we all folded over in a heap of giggles at daddy’s fantastic tale.

Until, that is, I tried to extract my poor third child from my arms only to discover he had a death grip on my neck and his little heart was racing wildly. I pulled his face back just enough to tell him everything was all right and he dissolved into tears and buried his face in my neck.

Landon is only 21 months old, so we didn’t even realize that he was paying attention to our story, much less comprehending it. But he did, poor baby, and we scared him half to death. He moaned “Daddy,” and refused to let go of my neck.

I finally extracted him enough to pass him off to Lee who held him tight and reassured him everything was okay, while we both cracked up looked on in pity feeling deeply saddened that we had scared the boy so much. Of course, Daddy always has the ability to make everything better and in no time had Landon laughing and happy again.

So, needless to say, I think we have sufficiently damaged the third child enough to ensure that he’ll need significant therapy as an adult to deal with his irrational fear of that mythical creature called Big Foot.

Yay us.

(eyeroll)

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Landon, Motherhood Tagged With: Big Foot

Don’t let the door hit you in the—

October 8, 2009 by Kelli

Mornings are crazy. We manage to get out the door, but not without a bit of stress. Can anyone identify?

Here’s how a typical (hectic) morning in the Stuart household looks:

Up at 7:00 – I know, I know…We should get up earlier; things would run so much more smoothly. I got it!

After breakfast is eaten, beds are made, teeth are brushed and kids are dressed, it 7:55. Awesome – we’ve got 5 minutes before the bus arrives. Just enough time for my blood pressure to level out.

Oh, but wait! It’s getting colder, which means we need coats on, and oh yeah! The hall closet is so packed with coats that by the time I dig one out that actually fits, it’s 7:58. Up goes the blood pressure and, at this point, I actually begin clapping my hands.

Yes, sometime in the last year, I actually morphed into the mom who claps her hands at her children. “C’Mon guys, we gotta go out. Let’s go, go, go!” clap, clap, clap.

By the time we manage to get out – usually Landon is the one who ends up outside without his shoes or coat on…poor third child – my heart is racing and I feel like I need a stiff drink. Don’t worry – I don’t imbibe. At least not yet.

Once child #1 is packed off to school (loaded down with hugs and kisses – I’m not mean mommy), it’s time for mommy to get dressed because I’m usually shivering out on the front porch barefoot in my pajamas. Once I get myself dressed and ready and finally get the poor third child fully clothed, I usually discover that Tia has shed her socks and shoes somewhere in the recesses of our house.

And by the time I get her shoes back on her feet, Landon has shed his shoes somewhere in the recesses of the house. So I threaten Tia within an inch of her life if she removes her shoes again, I clap my hands a few times for good effect, I locate Landon’s shoes and I pack the two younger kids in the car, not even bothering to put Landon’s shoes back on his feet.

At this point, I usually notice that the dog’s food and water bowls are bare and guilt sends my running back in to fill them.

When I come back out, it’s not uncommon to find Tia jumping around in the car rather than sitting in her seat with her belt buckled. Thus necessitating the need for more clapping.

My hands are getting raw.

I hop in the car and then it hits me. Where are my keys?! Where are my KEYS?!?

With the clock an ever present reminder of just how late we really are, I search, I tear, I mutter and growl, I stomp around the house, I pass the key ring hanging just inside the door where Lee always tells me to hang my keys when I come in and I glare at it for good measure.

(This evening, when running late for russian school, I may or may not have muttered a few choice words under my breath as I frantically searched for my missing car key. All the while Lee looked at me in mild amusement and wisely stayed out of my way. I found it in the bottom of my purse, by the way. Only after I checked there for the third time.)

Usually, though, I find them someplace really obvious, like the pocket of my jeans, or on the bathroom floor, or under the crumbled mess of snacks in the bottom of the diaper bag.

And somehow, I make it out the door, dropping Tia off with seconds to spare (loaded down with hugs and kisses, of course).

And many days I head to the gym where I drop Landon off and I fight the urge to curl up in the fetal position in a dark corner and suck my thumb.

Seriously, while I make it seem absolutely awful, our morning routine is not horrible, but it is hectic. Getting three kids dressed and ready to get out the door can be stressful.

So what about you? How do you make it out the door in the morning?

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Life, Motherhood