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Pumpkin Patch 2010

October 12, 2010 by Kelli

I’ve been going to Rambach’s Pumpkin Patch since I was a kid and for nine Halloween’s we haven’t missed visiting this patch with our kids. (The first year I was pregnant with Sloan).

So Sunday when the weather was balmy hot we decided to make the trek out there. It feels a little sacreligious to visit the Pumpkin Patch in shorts and T-shirts, but given the fact that I loathe cold weather I wasn’t overly concerned about. And the best part of this year’s visist was the fact that we got in and out of there without spending a dime.

Because we rock.

The trick is to go without money. And leave your ATM card in the car so you’re not tempted to get cash out while there. Then you can honestly tell the kids you don’t have any money. And you know what? They didn’t really care. They were happy to play on the playground, run through the pumpkins and simply enjoy being outdoors. They didn’t need overpriced pony rides and I had already told them we would buy our Pumpkins at Trader Joes because they’re cheaper.

And so I give you…the Pumpkin Patch of 2010. And a lame blog post. Sorry.

Filed Under: Family, Halloween, Holidays, Kids, Life Tagged With: Family Pictures, Halloween, Rambachs Pumpkin Patch

Potty Training 103

October 8, 2010 by Kelli

I’m not one to talk about all things potty on my blog. It isn’t my schtick. So you will not be getting all the gory details of Landon’s potty training, as diappointing as I’m sure that is to all of you.

Actually, things have been going as well as they could be around here. We’ve had plenty of accidents and when I say plenty I mean I’ve got six pairs of soiled underwear sitting in the basement waiting to be washed today. But we’re also having plenty of successes too.

The issue with child number three is the mobility of our lives. When I was enduring this conquering this with Sloan, we stayed home for a week. We did not leave the house. It was like house arrest…with leaking bodily waste. But we got the job done and after seven days it was over.

The second time around proved a bit more challenging thanks to an active four years old and a newborn in the house. There were many more accidents, but ultimately, we survived.

The third time around is almost feeling like an impossibility. He is having to be trained in Pull Ups most of the time, which is not overly effective in my opinion. But he really doesn’t like the picture on the front to disappear so that works in our advantage quite a bit. So far we’ve only had one major accident in public and that was yesterday at Walmart. Thankfully we made it out of the store before the dam broke.

He told me he had to go, then changed his mind and said he didn’t have to go. And I believed him. Sheesh. It’s like I’ve never done this before. Mom fail.

Otherwise we’re doing alright in public. And at home. Thankfully we are planning on getting new carpet soon so I’m not overly concerned when accidents happen on the floor. In fact, I’m kind of glad because I figure it will speed up the much needed process.

And speak of the devil, he just said he needs to go potty. Excuse me while I go fulfill my motherly duty and get up close and personal with my child. No one ever said motherhood was boring, right?

Filed Under: Family, Gross, Kids, Landon, Motherhood Tagged With: Landon, Motherhood, Potty Training

Tradition

October 6, 2010 by Kelli

It has become tradition each year in the fall for the kids and I to go to Twin Oaks Park for amateur photos (I am so amateur, too – I really wish I knew how to take better pictures). Afterwards they play on the playground and we go out to dinner. You can see last year’s pictures here.

The weather yesterday was beautiful and, despite the fact that it was Landon’s first official day of potty training, we headed off to the park for pictures.

I did not get the shots I hoped to, though, so if another nice day opens up I may go out and try again…if they’ll let me. This is all I could come up with. For all you photographers out there, I’m all ears to advice. Particularly, how do you take a good shot on a sunny day? If I face them toward the sun they squint. If I turn their backs to the sun, their faces are too dark. So I had the sun beside them for the pictures which means that half of their faces are shadows.

That frustrates me.

Still though – they’re pretty dang cute.

Sloan, a child after my own heart, has lately grown quite a love for writing. He has taken off in the reading and writing department and is rarely far from his spiral notebook. Yesterday I encouraged him to try writing a story and he wanted me to take a picture of him working on it. He was so proud of his story about Max and Nick going hiking in the woods with their “fery frins” (furry friends). The acorn may not have fallen far from the tree in this child…

I wouldn’t let Tia play on the playground in her Strasburg dress (mean mommy) so I made her change into play clothes. She then spent the next thirty minutes crossing back and forth on the monkey bars. So much so that her little hands are blistered and red. Another acorn, she is…

Landon is an acorn, himself, but for those of you who have seen his obsession and freakish skill with a basketball (and baseball, and tennis ball and football) you know that the tree he landed close to stands a little taller than me.

Filed Under: Kids, Landon, Life, Sloan, Tia Tagged With: Kids, Kids and Photography, Photography, Pictures of Cute Kids, Twin Oaks Park

Does this make my butt look big?

October 5, 2010 by Kelli

To all the men who read my blog…you know who you are. I just want you to know that I’m on to you. I’ve almost got you guys figured out. Oh yes I do. I have now birthed two beings of the male persuasion and raising them is giving me unique insight into all of you. Be very afraid.

My most recent insight come to me this morning in the form of my seven year old who has suddenly become very aware of what others think and how his peers perceive him. This is not something that surprised me, although it makes me sad that this awareness has creeped in so young.

This morning I laid out his clothes for him, as I do every morning that he lets me. Some mornings, when he’s feeling particularly ornery and independent he wakes up and dresses before I can get to him. Because it’s chilly out today, I made it a point to get to his clothes before him so that he would wear pants. Because the boy hates pants.

I laid out a pair of loose fitting cargo pants. They were a cotton material and I thought he would like them because they weren’t tight and they fit more like sport pants. I paired them with a Star Wars T-Shirt to sweeten the deal and prepared breakfast. Suddenly Sloan came stomping into the room.

“Mom, I am not wearing these pants,” he huffed.

“Why?” I asked, preparing my argument for why he could, indeed, not wear shorts when it’s 40 degrees outside.

“People will laugh at me,” he replied.

“Why would people laugh? Those pants are cool!”

“No, they’re not,” he moaned, slapping his hand to his forehead.

“Why are they not cool?” I said, stifling a laugh.

“Look at the back,” he said, turning around.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“It makes my butt look big in the mirror!” he wailed.

I let him change into jeans. Then he wanted to change into a tie dye shirt, “because that’s really cool.” I’m trying to win the war, folks…not the battle.

But this just proves that us girls are not the only ones checking out our butts in the mirror. You guys do it too. And you care. You care about image and how you look. This isn’t isolated to my kid, because my husband…he cares too. So does my brother. I’ve kind of been surrounded by the male species most of my life. You care. You check. You build outfits based on the perception of your butt.

Your secret’s out…

Filed Under: funny stuff that happens, Kids, Kids do the darndest things, Motherhood, Sloan Tagged With: boys and fashion, Kids, Kids are Funny, Kids do the darndest things, Men

Guess what we’re doing this week?

October 4, 2010 by Kelli

This is the part where you get down on your knees and pray…

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Landon, Motherhood Tagged With: craziness of motherhood, Kids, Landon, Potty Training, Toddlers

A Different Kind of Mountaintop

September 28, 2010 by Kelli

Roughly a week ago, I stood on the most beautiful mountaintop in Austria and for over an hour I took in God’s creation from the vantage point of a bird. It was breathtaking. I didn’t want the moment to end. As Lee and I hiked to various points of Krippenstein Peak, we commented more than once how we wished the kids were there. They would have loved it. I probably would have enjoyed it slightly less, of course, because I would have been too busy envisioning one of them tumbling over the side…

Our vacation was absolutely perfect. It was relaxing and adventurous. We had ten days to talk and we didn’t spend all of our time talking about the kids, although we spent a good deal of time talking about them. It was just the right amount of time. Not too long, not too short. It was wonderful in every way and I will forever be grateful that we had the opportunity to do that.

But I was ready to come home.

Lee is my family. But he isn’t my complete family. And walking in our back door to the three little faces that make up our complete family was equally as thrilling as climbing Krippenstein Peak (or…you know…riding up the cable car. I don’t climb mountains.)

They had wet hair and jammies on. They smelled better than any flower from any part of the world. They jumped up and down and yelled “Mommy! Daddy! Mommy! Daddy!” It sounded better than any mountaintop bird. They leapt in our arms and squeezed tight…more than once. It was better than any view from any peak of the world.

After a bit of play time and wrestle time we sat on the couch. Sloan, my sweet, tender hearted seven year old looked around quietly, then burst into tears. “I’m sad that you were gone so long,” he cried, big alligater tears glimmering in the corners of his eyes.

And then my heart tore in two.

“We’re home now,” we assured him as he crawled into Lee’s lap.

“I just missed you really a lot,” he said, wiping his nose on the back of his hand. And we got to explain to him about how God has blessed our marriage and about how Mommy and Daddy took some time to just celebrate God’s blessings in our life.

“But you know what?” we told them. “The biggest blessings of our marriage are you guys. Sometimes Mommy and Daddy need to get away and be together just the two of us. But we know that God gave us the greatest gifts of all when he gave you you guys and we are so thrilled to be back with you.”

After we got everyone calmed down and settled into bed, I dragged my weary, jet lagged body around the house and cleaned up a bit. As I walked back to my bedroom and passed Landon’s open door I heard a tiny voice.

“Mommy? Tan you tome hewe pwease?”

There is no amount of fatigue that could have stopped me from walking into that bedroom. I scooped him up and we sat in the yellow rocking chair beside his bed. He put his head on my shoulder, his little nose nestled into the fold of my neck. And as I rocked, his tiny hands patted me on the back.

It was a different kind of mountaintop…and I think I liked it best of all.

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Landon, Lee, Marriage, Motherhood, Sloan, Tia Tagged With: Coming home from vacation, Home, Kids, Motherhood

I Said “A Boom Chicka Boom…”

September 12, 2010 by Kelli

This post has nothing to do with that title – I have just really wanted to title a post that for a long time now…

Actually, this post really has to do with nothing at all. You’re ripe with excitement to read further aren’t you?

Maybe I should do an entire post of one liners.

So there was this blogger who walked into a bar…

Nah.

We’re T – four days and counting until the big trip. I’ve had some freak out moments in the last few days, the biggest being when I realized that we might have to cut Hallstatt out of the itinerary. My Hallstatt. My preciousssssss.

I fretted and fraught (fraught?) and worried and moped. But it was a reality that we had planned way more than we could probably feasibly accomplish in our short time over there. And I really didn’t want to cut out Tuscany. Something had to go. Until…wait a minute. Maybe not.

What it boiled down to is this: We need to be flexible. We I need to be willing to cut out Hallstatt if it becomes apparent that there is just no way we’re going to make it all the way there and still have time to book it down to Tuscany. And so I still have hope, my friends. You see, the goal is to try and stay off of the AutoBahn (and Autostrada) as much as possible. We want to explore and get the flavor of the land. We want to round a curve and be looking down at a village nestled in the mountains. This means that it will take longer to travel. But it also means we’re going to have an adventure.

And if we miss Hallstatt, we’ll just have to go back, right? Deal!

Moving on…

See? More one liners. There is always room for one liners.

Too bad these aren’t the funny kind of one liners.

They’re kind of boring actually…

Ah well.

Sloan woke up with a low grade fever tonight. I gave him some Tylenol and piled him back in bed where I hope he’ll wake up fever free for school tomorrow…because I’m that mom. If you’re not dying, you’re going, kiddo.

We’ll see.

We will also be buying Emergen-C in bulk tomorrow. And Zinc. And Echinacea. I will not come down with a fever on my dream vacation. Oh, and to our parents who are splitting kid duty for the ten days while we are away: I’m so, so sorry. Here’s to hoping whatever Sloan has doesn’t spread. Or maybe he doesn’t have anything. Here’s to hoping that.

Speaking of Sloan – he and I had a duke it out, we-might-not-make-it homework session tonight. I won. Barely. We’re having this minor issue with child #1 in that every.single.time we bring him to the table to do homework, he brings along a massive chip on his shoulder. He is heaping with sass these days and it’s never more apparent than when he is under educational duress. It is especially evident when it comes time to do russian homework. Ay-yay-yay.

When it was all said and done and that which could have been completed in twenty minutes was finally finished after an hour of sweat and tears (no blood, thankfully) I felt defeated and dejected. Now that I know he is running a low grade fever I feel a little better, but the truth is – homework is often painful.

But, just before bed, Sloan grabbed my hand and led me back to our bedroom and sat me down on the bed. “We need to have a little talk,” he said.

“I had a bad attitude tonight and I was just angry and upset and sometimes russian is really hard and I feel like I can’t do it. But I didn’t act right. I wasn’t ‘quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry’ and I’m sorry. Will you forgive me?”

He did that on his own. Without any prompting.

My heart is still a little gooey. Of course I was quick to offer my forgiveness and apologize for my lack of patience. Amends were made and we agreed to work as a team to make homework more fun. It is moments like those that I truly, truly love being a parent. Sure it’s cool when they hit a home run or draw you a picture, but when they exhibit a heart attitude that you have worked so hard to help shape and mold? That is when parenting is most rewarding. Just when I felt like I was the worst mom ever and totally incapable of successfully parenting that boy, he reminded me that his sweet little heart is full of gold nuggets just waiting to be dug up and harvested.

Do you harvest gold? Did I just mix metaphors?

So yes…parenting is wicked hard. But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

I wouldn’t even trade it for Hallstatt, Austria.

I Said “A booma ticka rocka ticka rocka ticka boom!”

The End.

Post edit: Sloan woke up fever free this morning and he happily skipped to school (well, happily skipped onto the school bus anyway). Whoop!

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Kids do the darndest things, Life, Motherhood, Random, Russian, School, Sickness, Sloan Tagged With: Hallstatt, Hallstatt Austria, Homework, Motherhood, parenting, Raising Kids, Random, Sloan, Working with Children

A Note to Samuel Clemens

September 9, 2010 by Kelli

Dear Sam,

I decided to read your book to my children last week. You know, the classic novel you wrote that captured 19th century boyhood with charm, wit and mischeif. I wanted my kids to have an adventure with Tom and Huck. I wanted them to know about what life was like back when days were not dictated by Miley Cyrus and iCarly. “The good ole days.” That’s what they were. I thought it would be a good idea to introduce my children to the children of your alter ego – Mark Twain.

I read yourbooks myself as a kid. I loved them. I remember adoring the love/hate between Tom and Becky, the thrill of the chase between Tom, Huck and the robbers and the awe at their receipt of $6,000 for capturing the bad guys. 6 thousand smackers! That was the largest sum of money I could fathom. And I wanted my children to experience the thrill of a great story…a piece of Americana.

However, my dear Mr. Twain…er, Clemens – can I call you Sam or perhaps, Mark? Sam? Okay. However, Sam, it appears that I had forgotten the nature of your writing. Your words, so eloquent in your time, were a bit more than my children could decipher. For instance, this sentence spoken by dear Aunt Polly had my poor children so puzzled I fear they will never allow me to pick out a book to read them again:

“He ‘pears to know just how long he can torment me before I get my dander up, and he knows if he can make me out to put me off for a minute or make me laugh, it’s all down again and I can’t hit him a lick.”

My goodness, Sam, even I had to stop and think about that one for a minute. We made it one chapter into your lovely novel before I realized that the kids eyes had glazed over and they were no longer listening to a word I said. They didn’t even get the fact that Tom had just whooped the big stranger on the path back to his house. You know, the boy he “‘lowed” to ‘”lay” for. That one. Yeah, they missed that. Crazy, huh?

There’s also the tiny issue of political correctness – a term that I am certain you would despise were you alive today. I simply cannot, in good conscience, Sam, read the slave Jim’s true character name as you wrote it so many years ago. It was an acceptable term then (acceptable to some, of course)…now, however, it just isn’t a word that needs to be used. Someday, when they’re older and can comprehend the beauty of your novels and they can understand the context in which they were written, I’m sure it will be fine for them to hear (or read for themselves) about Jim and his great escape from slavery by Huck’s side. But now, when they are too young to understand and too indescreet not to use certain words in public, I simply wouldn’t be able to read your novel in it’s purest form. And that seems unfair to you. And to them. And, honestly, to Huck and Jim.

So forgive me, dear Mr. Clemens, if I put this book back on the shelf of a few more years. Forgive me if I show them the movies made of your iconic tales instead. I want to inspire their imaginations, Sam, I really do. But they can’t be inspired under such educational duress. I did find, today, this book, which has been edited and abridged specifically for children. It only tells a piece of the story, but it does introduce them to the scrappy Tom, a character I so loved growing up. I think I will give it a try…you know, when they’ve had time to forget how utterly and completely bored and confused they were the first time I introduced Tom and Huck.

Don’t take it personally, Sam. I still love your books and I still plan to expose my children to your iconic tales. But I’m sure you understand that it’s better to give them a love for literature, not an absolute dread. Thanks for your books. Thanks for your imagination. Sorry it didn’t work out this time around.

Sincerely,

A literature nerd who forgot that sometimes classics are not neccesarily proper for young children

Filed Under: books, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Motherhood, Random Tagged With: Huck Finn, Mark Twain, Reading Tom Sawyer to young children, Samuel Clemens, Tom Sawyer

Today I plan to melt your hearts

September 8, 2010 by Kelli

Yesterday was Tia’s first day of preschool so it was only natural that I pull out my trusty magic camera and take 697 pictures before she left.

The results were glorious. She was cute, naturally. She can’t help but be cute. And Sloan was ever the charmer.

“Mom, you can take two pictures of me and that’s it. I don’t want any more.”

Right. I took a couple more than two. Don’t tell…

It is the shots of Landon, however, that will leave you with a toothache. This is due in part to the fact that his hair was so spectcular when he woke up that I had to wet it down and slick it to the side. Chubby cheeked cherub with slicked back hair?

Sweetness.

Combine that with a pair of pants that I found at a little shop in Orlando this summer – pants with suspenders – and you have a recipe for pure love. It also makes for some great pictures. So I present you my children. You’re welcome.

And, of course, the first day of school wouldn’t be the first day of school without a good old fashioned tree climb. In a dress…

And one more of Landon, because sweet mercy! That face is amazing. Don’t you just want to eat him up?

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Kids do the darndest things, Landon, Motherhood, School, Sloan, Tia

the one where I wax poetic

September 1, 2010 by Kelli

Just kidding. I’m not going to wax poetic about anything. I actually am going to partake in a little verbal vomit. See? Vomit. It’s not a very poetic word. I should change the title of this post, but I don’t want to. Maybe I’ll be inspired as I write and maybe I will begin to wax poetic about life and it’s deeper meanings.

But probably not.

I really don’t have much to say these days. Probably because I’m old and my high falutent weekend in New Orleans has made me feel a bit like I got beat with a rubber mallet then tossed to the side like a rag doll. This mama isn’t used to seeing 2:00 am unless it’s to administer medicine to fevery babies or fill hungry tummies.

I’m tired.

Speaking of last weekend, I must say that there were moments when I looked around and thought What in the world am I doing here? I felt very…how shall I put this…midwest. I was surrounded by all of these interesting, funny, stylish, green, city folk and here I was, the minivan mom from the suburbs. I tell ya, I had to fight from saying things like, Well Golly Gee, or Aw shucks. I think I may have had an I declare or two in me, but I held back. And upon my return I had a strong urge to sell my car and start using public transit and to keep all the lights in the house turned off and check my carbon imprint (or is it my carbon print…or footprint?). But, well, shucks guys, that would make this suburban mama a little less comfortable so I think I’ll keep trucking along as I’m going in life.

‘Cause it’s swell.

Speaking of swell…um, I really don’t have anything else swell to say. I was looking for a transition. That was a poor effort. Did I mention I’m exhausted? Sloan told me yesterday that he no longer wants to be a policeman when he grows up, but he would like to be a shark trainer instead. When I informed him that he would have to be very brave because that’s a dangerous job he gave me the look that only a 7 year old going on14 can give. You know the one, right? It’s that look that says, Duh, Mom. What are you, like, some sort of midwest hick?

“I’ll start working with the sharks who are already trained. Then I will move on to their friends that need to be trained.”

Right. What was I thinking?

“Hey mom,” he went on. “You remember that time when I was a baby and I met that shark?”

“Um, no.”

“Yeah, remember? I was a little baby. It was my first time to Florida and I met a shark.”

“Sorry, bud. I don’t remember that at all.”

“Oh. Well…I might have made that up.”

Gee willikers, my kid is super neato.

I should get up and get moving. The dog is laying at the foot of my bed and I can hear her stomach growling quite fiercely. I had all these lofty goals to get up early and get a lot of work done (because I have a lot of work to do) but I had the migraine of the century last night and didn’t sleep much. Thank God for modern medicine, eh? I may have overdosed slightly but I knocked out the headache so I win. I offer my deepest apologies to my liver which is now working over time to rid my body of toxins.

So on that note, I offer you this:

May your day today be filled with joy, headache free and super duper swell.

The end.

p.s. I’m categorizing this post as random. That sounds about right, wouldn’t you say?