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Dear Mom and Dad in England

April 24, 2011 by Kelli

Hi.

So while you were off galavanting (something I’ve found you seem to be quite good at) about the English countryside this weekend, I was left to handle Easter on my own. While you toured Shakespeare’s birthplace and hiked through the animal infested forests, I realized that not only did I need to create some kind of Easter feast for my family, but I also needed to fill up Easter baskets with goodies. I realized this on Saturday.

I would like you to know that I managed to squeak by without you but I almost ruined Easter for good. And Christmas too. And I blame it almost entirely on you.

I dashed out Saturday afternoon for a last minute grocery run, in the rain. Me and the entire senior citizen population of St. Louis County. I bought a pork roast. Not even a pre-packaged one from the refridgerated section, but an actual one from the meat guy. He’s not a butcher is he? Do I just call him the meat guy? Whatever. I bought it from him. He wrapped it in white paper. Fancy.

Score one for me.

I also purchased a round birthday cake with a picture of a bunny on it. And ice cream. I was rocking the Easter preparations.

I purchased 45 plastic eggs to put in their baskets. Why so many? Because I didn’t buy anything else. You know, dear mother, how you always filled up our baskets with fun little trinkets and goodies as a kid? Yeah…I didn’t do that. I kind of forgot. Thank God I had the DVD’s you purchsed for the kids before you left for England, right?

Minus one for me. Holding steady at 0. Plus six for you, though, for planning way in advance.

When I got home I tried to sneak by the kids with the plastic eggs. You know, because how was I going to explain that the Easter Bunny used eggs we already owned. I failed, though. Eagle Eyes Tia saw the eggs and screeched with delight.

“What are those for?” they all asked, pushing in on me like tiny little blonde vultures.

I thought quick on my feet, though. You would’ve been proud. “We’re going to put them in your Easter baskets and see if the Easter Bunny fills them up while you sleep.”

BOOM! Score three for Mommy.

They each got a movie, a chocolate bunny (of course) and 14 eggs, which the Easter Bunny did fill while they slept. Except the Easter Bunny is stingy and paranoid about their teeth rotting out so the eggs only had one chocolate or a couple of jelly beans in them. When it was all said and done they only had a snack bag amount of candy.

Three measly jelly beans...

“Is dis all dere is?!” Tia exclaimed after searching through her basket. There were no stickers, no toys, no coloring books. “Mom, where does the Easter Bunny come from exactly?” Sloan asked, a little disgruntled. “Is he real?”

I had to bite my lip from answering, “Look, the Easter Bunny moved to England, okay?!” Minus four for Mommy. I hereby stand at a negative 1.

“That’s what they say,” I answer, dodging the question. “Well, is Santa real or is he just a guy in a costume?” Six eyes stare at me intently.

“St. Nicholas was a real man who delivered gifts to boys and girls,” I answered, sweat beading on my hairline. “Hey look! Breakfast is ready – come eat quick!”

Plus 1 for dodging a bullet.

I did remember to put the pork roast in the crock pot (God’s gift to half brained moms) the night before so Easter dinner was partially prepared early. Which was good since I had to be at church at 7:30 and didn’t get home until 12:45, which means Lee was in charge of Easter lunch. They ate without me. Pork Roast, Stove Top stuffing from a box and sourdough bread. No vegetables or special sides to make the meal memorable because I wasn’t there to fix.

I get plus 2 for preparing the meat early, but minus 1 for not preparing anything else. I think this leaves me at a plus 1.

The rest of Easter Sunday was quite lovely, actually. While we desperately missed being with family, I must say it was nice to just be our little core unit of 5 for the day. I reminded me, Mom and Dad, of all those years when we were growing up and didn’t have family close by. My holiday memories are filled with leisurely afternoons with you all and Brett.

We went to Applebees for dinner, which felt kind of lame, but it made the kids happy so I’m giving myself 1 point. And when we came home, we cleaned up the house, put on our jammies, ate bunny cake and watched Yogi Bear as a family. I’m awarding myself another point for going with the flow.

So that means my final tally came in at plus 3. Not bad. Easter wasn’t a total wash after all.

But it still would have been better with you here.

Have fun for the remainder of your English adventure. Tell Will and Kate I said hi…

Love, Your Daughter in St. Louis.

If only they looked alike...

I laughed until I cried when I saw this picture. Landon's head looks detached from his body.

Studio Shot!

Filed Under: Easter, Family, Holidays, Kids Tagged With: Easter, Kids, letter, Motherhood, Photography

Scenes from a morning

April 21, 2011 by Kelli

It starts with one.

Then another.

A third stumbles in.

A fourth comes bearing coffee.

All before 7:00. This is what dreams are made of…

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Lee, Life Tagged With: Kids, Life, morning, Photos

The St. Louis Zoo

April 14, 2011 by Kelli

The amazing spring day yesterday made for spontanaity when the younger kiddos and I met up with a friend for a last minute trip to the Zoo. I love our Zoo – it’s big, it’s beautiful, it’s free… In addition to seeing animals, we also got to soak in the Zoo’s beautiful landscaping. I just love tulips, don’t you?

I love taking pictures of my kids looking at the animals. I love how intent and excited they are when they see God’s creation. This picture just makes me think of childhood.

It also makes me think of this post. Oy…

Becke, this one is for you.

Have you ever tried to rangle four squirmy children into one small canoe and then sit and smile for the camera? It’s not possible. But check out my friend Bethany’s little boy. How handsome is he?

Tune in tomorrow to hear about how I didn’t die in my race this past weekend. It included a whole lot of prayer, a bit of will power and the entertainment of a couple of shocking sights.

Riv-e-ting.

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Life Tagged With: Life, Photos, Springtime, St. Louis Zoo, tulips

Magic Monkey on the Wall

April 8, 2011 by Kelli

We have a naughty little Monkey in our midst. He’s mischevious and sneaky and you never really know where you’ll find him. See for yourself:

Sometimes this mischevious little monkey convinces the stuffed bear to join in on the antics and we find them together on the shelf.

Thus far, however, he hasn’t been able to convince Old Monkey (aka, Steve) to climb with him. Steve just doesn’t have it in him anymore. He’s a little over three years old. In Sock Monkey years that’s 104. He also has a bum arm and leg…

There are squeals of delight multiple times a day as we discover where New Monkey has settled himself. “I fink he must be awive!” they cry.

We’ve tried to catch Monkey in the act of swinging and climbing, but he’s just too clever. As you can see from some of the pictures above, we’ve almost caught him. We’ve seen him mid-swing more than once, but he always manages to freeze before we can get to him.

Yesterday they were determined to keep Monkey in their sights all day in the hopes that they would see him move. But wouldn’t you know, when they turned their backs for one second he managed to scamper up on top of the fridge!

Silly Monkey.

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Random Tagged With: fun, Kids, Sock Monkey, Toys coming alive

Olympic Gold 2024?

April 6, 2011 by Kelli

About a month ago, we received an email from Tia’s gymnastics facility inviting her to be a part of an advanced developmental team. The idea is that for the next year and a half, she and several other advnaced 5-7 year olds will learn bigger and harder skills with the goal of entering into competitive gymnastics.

The decision for whether or not to do this turned into quite a big deal for Lee and I. We stressed and prayed and talked to a lot of people about whether or not we should allow her to participate in this class.

The training schedule for this program is not overly strenuous. It’s only 3.5 hours a week of gym time. But Tia is also only 5 and we didn’t want to push her into something too early. For over a year, Tia has been in a preschool aged class and she has been far too advanced for the group. While most of the girls in that class were still trying to figure out what foot to put in front to successfully turn a cartwheel, Tia was performing running round off’s with almost perfect precision.

She’s kind of a natural.

Try not to be jealous of the art that is this photo. It's like you're there watching, isn't it? Ah, who're we kidding - I stink at indoor photography.

On the other hand, Lee and I are fairly certain that gymnastics is not a long term sport for Tia, mainly because she’s going to be too tall. As a former competitive gymnast and gymnastics coach myself, I have a bit of experience with this sport. I thought an opportunity like this for my daughter would thrill me, and it did. But it also terrified me! One of the questions Lee and I wrestled through was this: Tia will likely outgrow this sport by the time she is a preteen, so do we need to waste the time and money on training for something that she won’t be able to do long term?

"Take my picture wike I won da gold medal, Mom!"

Ultimately we decided to give her the chance to try it out. We’re trying it for two months. The practices are twice weekly and yes, it means our schedule just got a little crazier given that baseball season has also recently begun. Even if she doesn’t do gymnastics past the fifth grade, the skills she is learning will serve her in any sport she chooses. She’s learning strength, coordination, flexibility and discipline.

Plus, she’s pretty excited that within a few months she’ll be doing back flips on the trampoline.

So we’ll see what happens. At the end of May we’ll decide if we’re going to continue with this program or just put her in an advanced class without the goal of competition. This may disappoint the boys who spent the evening last night doing what boys to best.

Watching girls.

Filed Under: Family, Kids, Motherhood, Tia Tagged With: athletics, competitive gymnastics, Kids and sports, Motherhood

Because they’re funny, that’s why

April 4, 2011 by Kelli

I heard a comment recently from someone who claimed to love reading “Mommy blogs” but hated when bloggers went on and on about their kids.

Um…I don’t think you like reading “Mommy Blogs” then. (Not a fan of the “Mommy Blog” term…couldja tell?) That’s like me saying I like fish but don’t like when it tastes fishy. Riiight. Let’s just call a spade a spade. I don’t like fish. Unless it’s thickly breaded and double dipped in a vat of oil then served with a side of ketchup.

That’s my kind of fish.

When I first heard this statement I found myself a little self conscious. I mean, I talk about my kids all the blasted time here. What if I’m boring people? Because let’s face it, I can say that I’m only blogging to keep a record of the cute and funny things they do until I’m blue in the face, but we all know I want you to like me.

And I want to remember the cute and funny things they do so I can look back ten years later and smile…and humiliate them. It’s a scrapbook that yields sweet revenge.

I’m only half way kidding.

So here it is: I am a blogger who happens to be a mom. Write what you know, correct? Well right now, I know Mom-ing. (I could have written I know Motherhood but turning “Mom” into a verb sounded like more fun.) So I’m going to write about Mom-ing, and all the other stuff that interests me that doesn’t involve my kids. Which isn’t a lot because I’m kind of in the trenches of this Mom thing.

So today I’m writing about my kids, because dang it my kids are funny. Maybe they’re only funny to me and their grandparents, but I don’t care. This post might seem a little fishy, but I’ll try and deep fry something for you another day, okay? Just indulge me, if you could be so kind. Tomorrow I’ll write about something more riveting…like my house. You’re on the edge of your seat – I just know it!

Lee left yesterday for a two week training in New Jersey. Before the kids and I headed off to church, he buckled everyone in and doled out last minutes hugs and kisses. He and Sloan managed to squeeze in an early round of basketball before we left. I’m sure the neighbors were thrilled.

As Lee leaned in to kiss Sloan, my tender hearted man-child teared up a bit. Lee smiled and touseled his hair and Sloan grinned, shaking his head.

“I’m not crying,” he said, all macho-like. “My eyes are just sweating.”

My eyes are sweating a bit as I type this. Happens to the best of us…

Sloan continued. “Hey Dad, will you get us a present when you go to New York?”

“Sure,” Lee said. I think his eyes were a little sweaty too. “What do you want me to get you?”

“A girlfriend,” Sloan replied without missing a beat. Aaaaand it comes back around. I guess he thought he’d see if his dad would indulge his apparent need for a girlfriend since I told him a couple of weeks ago that No, I would not get him a girlfriend for his eighth birthday. After sharing this I launched into a very sweet, deep and meaningful conversation with him about how God has already picked out and planned a wife for him someday and he doesn’t need to worry about dating right now.

Clearly my words had an impact.

Not to be outdone, Tia piped up from the backseat as we headed down the road to church. “Hey Mom? How old do I have to be to get mawwied?”

“Old enough to be able to say your ‘R’s,” I replied…

No, I didn’t. I actually told her it would be a long time and she didn’t need to start thinking about that now.

“Well, I fink I should be 29 when I get mawwied. Will I be a mom before I get mawwied?”

“Nope,” I said. “You gotta get married first to be a mom.” Yes, I know that’s not necessarily true, but she’s five and we’re keeping it simple. She doesn’t need an explanation on when and how one can or should become a mom.

Tia has actually popped out a couple of funny one-liner’s lately. I forgot how funny five year old’s can be. When we ate lunch one day in Florida, I handed Sloan a ham sandwich.

“Does that have Man Eyes on it?” Tia asked. She meant Mayonaise. And just like that, our family now has a new catch word. We will forever call Mayonaise “Man Eyes.”

And then there’s Landon – the family clown, the kid who’s always good for a laugh, the boy with expressive eyes and a personality that far outweighs his tiny little bird frame. He walks through the house daily singing the songs from High School Musical 3. He sings them completely wrong, but that’s what makes it so fun. My favorite goes like this:

I don’t know where to go, Whatsa right fing. I want my oh dwee so Battleforce Strange.

If you know what song I’m talking about, you know why that’s cute and funny. It also means that you, like me, know way too much about High School Musical 3.

It’s those little conversations that make me laugh out loud that give me reason to blog about my kids. Well, that and the humiliation thing.

I’m kidding…sort of.

Filed Under: Blogging, Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Kids do the darndest things, Landon, Motherhood, Sloan, Tia Tagged With: Blogging, HSM3, Kids, kids say the darndest things, Motherhood

Disconnected, Unedited

March 25, 2011 by Kelli

I have had a lovely time in Florida with the kids. This week I have purposely disconnected from the internet. I felt bogged down by my overwhelming need to be online all the time and I just needed a break. Other than a few photos on Facebook, I’ve simply kept the computer off and have relaxed.

It’s been fun to reconnect with the kids. We’ve played tag and Crazy Eights. We’ve watched movies and played for hours in the sand. We visit the tennis courts daily where I “play” tennis with the kids. It consists of me chasing the ball for a half an hour while they laugh manaically as they swing with all their might.

And today, I totally earned Mom of the Year for wading out into the frigid ocean with Sloan because he wanted to snorkle. Apparently his skin is made out of leather because he didn’t seem to notice the cold. I, however, thought I was going to go into hypothermic shock. Because my skin is made out of paper…

Today could not have been more perfect day. So perfect that I ended up with a bit of a sunburn, which I hate because I’m all paranoid about the wrinkles that are cropping up on my face. But whatever, each new wrinkle represents a day of fun in the sun.

That doesn’t at all make me feel better, but I’m trying really hard to not freak out.

Photos, straight out of the camera because I don’t feel like editing them:

She didn't like the cold water. Or the waves. While trying to run out of the water she fell and cut her toe. Good times...

More fun in the sun awaits us while everyone at home is bundling up against the final remnants of winter. I will read, rest and delight in the laughter of my kids. Right now, I will sleep!

Filed Under: Family, Kids Tagged With: Clearwater Beach, Kids and Photos, Spring Break

Emphasis on Spring

March 21, 2011 by Kelli

Perfect weather is a beautiful thing…

And this last photo just to make you laugh out loud. I freaking love this kid…

Tomorrow? The Beach!

Filed Under: Family, funny stuff that happens, Kids, Kids do the darndest things Tagged With: I love spring, Kids, Outside, Photos, Spring Break

On Earaches and Mary

March 14, 2011 by Kelli

On Friday night Landon asked to go to bed. This was after he asked to take a nap on Friday afternoon and he slept for two hours.

Not normal.

At 11:00 Friday Landon woke up crying. He was at the tail end of a cold so a little medicine, a kiss and a cup of water and everyone settled once again. Until…

One O’clock rolled around and we heard the desperate pleas of our little one. And he never went back to sleep.

“My eeaaaw huwts,” he cried all night, clutching at his left ear. We rocked and sang and he’d slowly drift to sleep only to jolt awake again with a cry. Back and forth we went between his room and our own room, Lee and I alternating trying to sleep and holding our hurting boy. We debated heading to the ER but knew it was an ear infection and decided to wait it out until morning.

At 5:30 we put in High School Musical and I dozed on the couch. By 9:00 we were in the pediatrician’s office where it was declared he had a nasty inner ear infection with a painful looking bulge and by 10:30 we were home with a little boy who looked like this.

Not only did he look exhausted, he also look abused due to an unfortunate run in with the corner of the iPad the night before that left him with a shiner. He was pitiful and in pain most of Saturday but by Sunday morning had perked up considerably thanks to numbing drops, antibiotics and twleve hours of solid sleep. We were on the mend, and we were happy.

When his ear began dripping blood on Sunday morning we began fast and furiously treating what we think may have been a slight perforation in his ear drum with both antibiotic ear drops and oral antibiotics as we are flying a week from tomorrow and we need his ear healed. So far the pediatrician has cleared us to fly and is confident that he will be fine by the time we leave. This is a good thing because if she said he wouldn’t be I was already planning the car trip.

Sunday afternoon I went to a practice for an Easter drama that a few of us are putting on on Easter Sunday. It’s a beautiful piece of work and I found myself very emotional at one point when the character of Christ speaks the word, “Mother?” This happens during the crucifixion scene.

And my heart broke a little as I pictured Mary watching her baby suffer. My heart crumbled just seeing Landon suffer through ear pain, but Mary watched her son beaten, bruised and hung. She watched the blood drain from the very hands that she held as a small child. She saw the flesh torn from the back of the boy she bathed as a boy.

She suffered.

As my children grow I’m realizing more and more that I will always and forever see the infant form of them. Sloan is developing a man-child look about him and yet I still see the expressive toddler who marveled at the moon. Tia’s face matures a little more each day and yet I still see the big-eyed infant who couldn’t wait to conquer the world.

Landon is right where I want him right now. He is today who I will never forget.

Mary felt the same way. I understand that more and more the longer I parent. She saw the man who hung on the cross, but did her mind flash to him toddling into her arms? It most surely did. Did she remember sloppy kisses and delighted laughter? I’m sure of it. As she stared at his arms stretched wide across the beams, did her own arms ache with the memory of the weight of her infant? Did she smell the stench of the stable and see the dark, round eyes of her firstborn nuzzled against her chest?

What kind of memories flooded her mind’s eye?

And as he suffered and died slowly, did she experience pain herself? What was swirling through her heart? It pains me to even think about it, as it pained me to watch my toddler clutch at his ear in pain.

When they hurt, we hurt.

And then, when she heard He was alive – what did she feel? What kind if disbelief and shock and fear and joy coursed through her veins? When she saw His resurrected body, did she still see the little boy she raised or was He different somehow? Did He give her an extra long hug and a kiss on the cheek, a balm to the wound she had suffered three days before?

I wonder about these things.

Mary was a mother.

I am a mother.

And so I ponder.

Filed Under: Easter, faith, Family, Holidays, Kids, Landon, Motherhood Tagged With: Christ, Crucifixion, Easter, Mary, Resurrection, thoughts

Digging Down Deep

March 3, 2011 by Kelli

Today is one of those days when I feel like I’m done. I have nothing left. I gave so much of myself last week and I used every bit of my reserve energy to survive and get through that I have little left this week. Lee is home now, which helps, but unfortunately work is such that I’m still alone a lot, with sick children, a house to pack (we’re hoping to put it on the market in a few weeks) and a long list of other responsibilities staring me in the face.

And I am exhausted. So tired that my eyes actually ache. And given the fact that I have a three year old who refuses to nap, afternoon rest is likely not in my forecast. *sad face*

This is one of those days/weeks that I am going to need to dig down deep. One of those days/weeks when I have nothing left of my own to offer. One of those days/weeks when my time with my Bible is like lapping from the sweet stream waters after an arduous hike.

I’m digging down deep. I am in survival mode. In this fog I honestly don’t see an end in sight, but I know there is one. In three weeks I’ll be in Florida. The Beach is waiting for me. And my mom will be there. Ah! Suddenly there is a small light at the end of the tunnel.

It’s called Spring Break.

What do you all do when you have to dig deep? What gets you through those longs days/weeks/months/years when life is overwhelmingly full?

Filed Under: Family, Life, Motherhood, Travel Tagged With: digging deep, mommy fatigue, Spring Break