Dear 5:00 AM…

I set my alarm for 5:00 AM this morning. Go ahead. You can laugh. It’s funny.

I really thought I could handle it. I even went to bed at 9:45 last night. I felt very responsible when I turned the lamp off before the 10:00 hour. How grown up of me, right? But what seemed like mere moments after closing my eyes, the alarm on my phone start screaming in my ear.

5:00 AM?!

I don’t know what I was thinking.

Incidentally, I spent a lot of time trying to find the perfect alarm sound to wake me up. I listened to every option provided on my phone and I painstakingly chose the sound that was least offensive. It sounded like little fairies ringing bells, gentle and serene. When I chose it, I pictured myself leaping out of bed in song. Like a musical.

Good Mornin’. Good Moooornin’.

In this vision I tap danced through the house, happy and free as a lark. I don’t know how to tap dance, although I did take lessons a few years ago and had the time of my life. I should do that again…

But, oddly enough, when my alarm went off this morning, it didn’t sound like fairies ringing bells any more. IT SOUNDED LIKE THE DEVIL HIMSELF CLANGING SYMBOLS IN MY EAR.

It was angry and harsh and I wanted to punch someone, not sing.

Then I got back in bed.

“Is that your alarm to get up and work?” Lee asked. He wasn’t really interested in the answer so much as he just wanted to acknowledge the offensiveness of being awakened by evil bells at 5 in the morning.

I grunted in reply and promptly closed my eyes. For the next 37 minutes, my brain and my body warred against the morning. It went down something like this:

BRAIN: “Get up. You have a lot to do this week. If you don’t get up now you won’t have time to get anything done this morning.”

BODY: “Shut up.”

BRAIN: “Seriously, just get up. You will be fine if you get up and move around. You can have coffee. You won’t regret it, but you will regret staying in bed and not getting anything done.”

BODY: “Shut. Up.”

BRAIN: “Alright that’s it you lazy BEEP. Get up! Get up! GET! UP!”

BODY: *sitting up at squinting at the clock that reads 5:24* “Ten more minutes. Now shut up.”

BRAIN: “Check the clock. I think it’s been ten minutes. Check the clock. Seriously. Your window of peace and productivity is shrinking exponentially. Check the clock. CHECK IT!”


Sighing, I rolled out of bed and landed with a thud on the floor. Stumbling to the kitchen, I noticed how beautiful and serene the house felt. Dark and quiet, patiently waiting for the hustle of energy to roar to life. I liked it. The peace of the moment made me happy.

It did not make me feel like singing, though. Or dancing.

If any of you need me later, I’ll be on the couch taking a nap…

While I’ve got you all captivated here with my amazing and deep words of wisdom and grace, I might as well show you a few pictures from our Easter weekend, don’t you think? Wouldn’t that make your day? You’re welcome.

We spent the weekend with my cousin, Sean (whose book I hope you all purchased and are impatiently awaiting its arrival) and his wife, Addie, and their two cuties. The huge waves at the beach Friday made for three hours of crazy fun for the kids.

Glow in the Dark Easter Egg Hunt. Too much fun.

Sloan and his pet fox...I mean, dog.

I hope you all had a Happy and Blessed Easter filled with love, laughter and lots of chocolate.


  1. Oh Kelli, I wish I could tell you that eventually you’ll become adjusted. Things will settle into place, but I’ve been getting up at 5:00 am for years. (I have to be at work by 7) When I drove to Little Rock every day it was 4:45. I never leap out of bed singing and I almost always hit the snooze once. I am in bed and asleep by 10 nearly every night too. This is coming from a non night owl, very much a morning person, gets up at 6:30 or 7 on the weekends kind of gal. 5:00 am just ain’t natural!!!

    • Amen to that! I’m definitly a morning person, too. But 5:00 isn’t morning. It’s night. I don’t know how you do it every day. My hat goes off to you! 🙂

      • No hats off to me, trust me. I grump…a lot! My favorite saying is, “you do what you have to do, whether you like it or not!”
        Have a fantastic day. Enjoy that Florida weather. It decided to cool off again here in Arkansas. Yesterday was cold outside. Yuck!

  2. 5:00 a.m. is not meant for work but for sleeping, hunting, fishing, surfing, even travel, but never for work. “Morning people” is a term used for a form of mental illness prevalent in many, seemingly incurable, that can be dangerous to those of us in the world of sanity. Just look at them during OUR best time of day, late night, when they are irrational, grumpy, almost comatose (just like us at 5 a.m.). Avoid them at all cost as rumor is this illness is contagious. Love you!

    • I have a SERIOUS illness that developed after I had kids wherein I try to be both a morning and a night person. This makes me grumpy and irrational in the middle of the day and necessitates the need for a nap around 2:00 like an old person. Or a toddler. Not attractive. 🙂

  3. Sean Cooper says

    In the words of Addie, 5am is butt-early. Please don’t give up though because there are people out here waiting for your book. Favorite author of mine, Steven Pressfield writes this:

    The following is a list, in no particular order, of those activities that most commonly elicit Resistance (I’m only posting a couple):

    1. The pursuit of any calling in writing, painting, music, film, dance, or any creative art, however marginal or unconventional.

    2. Any activity whose aim is tighter abdominals.

    3. Any course or program designed to overcome an unwholesome habit or addiction.

    The War of Art, Pressfield

    • “Any activity whose aim is tighter abdominals.” Ha! That made me laugh. I need to get that book. 🙂

  4. I totally share your pain. I hit the snooze button at least 4 times this morning THEN just failed by setting the alarm back to 7:15. My singular credit was actually getting up at 7:06. It does not matter if I got 12 hours of blissful rest, I will NEVER like hearing the alarm. I NEVER jump out of bed excited about anything. You wanna know what I think Paul’s “thorn in the flesh” was? He was not a morning person either.

  5. Oh, and the “pet fox” cracked me up!

  6. I know what you mean! 5 or even 6:30 a.m. is too freaking early! My sister wakes up at 4:30 every morning. She has four kids so she says from 4:30-5:15 is her free time. To which I reply, I’d rather spend my free time sleeping. Later that night you can pop in a video then go hide in the bathroom. My mom is like my sister. She wakes up at 4:45 a.m. and does a bunch of laundry and works out. Her “sleep in” is waking up at 5:30. Gah! My dad and brother are the same way waking at 5 a.m. HOW DO THEY DO THAT? And how did I not get that gene?

    • What time do they go to bed? I’m so curious as to how people function when they get up that early. I couldn’t keep my eyes open at 2:00 this afternoon. Does your body adjust? It’s so baffling!

  7. Sounds like me….every Sunday night!! I’m gonna go to bed early and I’m gonna get up early in a splendid sugary sweet mood…only I change my alarm tone to the most obnoxious one I can find, so I won’t sleep through it and some how incorporate it into my dreams. And every morning, I wake up and give myself a pep talk about how wonderful my morning is going to be because I’m going to wake my girlsup in the best mood EVER…and then I walk out of my bedroom and REALITY kicks me square in the teeth. NONE of us are morning people!!